Read the body. Name the feeling. Carry a second umbrella.
Nursing, from 1988 onwards, taught me something no textbook had. Patients rarely say “I am frightened” or “I am grieving”. They tell you with their shoulders, their throat, their eyes on the floor. A good nurse learns to read the body before the chart. Thirty-eight years later, as a social worker, lecturer and coach, I still read people that way, and I want you to read yourself the same way.
Jo dil mein hai, woh chehre pe aata hai.
What lives in the heart finds its way to the face.
Where do you feel it?
| Where I feel it | What it may be | One thing to try |
|---|---|---|
| Whole body, warm and light | Happiness | Pause and savour it for ten seconds. Let it sink in. |
| Heart, chest full | Love | Say it out loud to the person today. |
| Skin tingling | Excitement | Use the energy: start the task now. |
| Muscles tight, shoulders up | Anxiety | Drop your shoulders. Breathe out slower than you breathe in. |
| Throat tight, a lump | Sadness | Let the words or tears come. Speak to someone you trust. |
| Face hot, eyes down | Shame | Ask: would I judge a friend this harshly? |
| Mouth, urge to spit it out | Disgust | Step back. Which of my values has been crossed? |
A guide, not a rule: the same feeling can land in different places for different people. Inspired by research by Nummenmaa and colleagues (2014), who mapped where people feel emotions in the body.
My FEEL Model
- F, Find it: Where in my body is it? Scan from head to toe.
- E, Explain it: Give it a name. A named feeling loses half its power.
- E, Ease it: Do the one small thing from the chart.
- L, Lend it: Look up. Who near me is caught in the storm? Offer the second umbrella.
The FEEL Model © Dr Shiam Chuttoo, 2026. Created by Dr Shiam Chuttoo. It may be used only with his permission or with full credit to him.
The second umbrella
An old man walks into a café on a wet afternoon carrying two umbrellas. A young lad asks him why he needs two when he walks alone. He smiles: “One keeps me dry. The other is for whoever I find caught in the storm.”
Anyone who has waited at a bus stop in Kent in October knows how fast the rain comes. Nursing taught me to lend my steadiness until the other person finds their own. A tight throat, a hot face, hunched shoulders: that is someone’s storm. Be the one holding the spare umbrella.
Too long alone
Loneliness lives in the body as well: a heavy chest, a tired step. Strength is not always standing alone. Sometimes the bravest thing is to take a chance on people, open your heart, and let someone hold the umbrella over you.
My check-in today
I feel it in my ______. It may be ______. I will ______.
Find it. Explain it. Ease it. Lend it.
Dr Shiam Chuttoo
© Dr Shiam Chuttoo, 2026. Free to share for personal and educational use with credit. For any other use, please ask my permission.
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